by Sara-Marie

Remember me?  It feels like forever since the days when we were friends.

    Ah, MTV.  One might call them repetitive, boring, and just so teeny, but I'd rather call them reliable and consistent.  I could always rely on MTV, even to do such a major task as to reunite my brothers and I.
    It started with this card my parents forwarded onto me and Isaac.  It was an invitation to an MTV function, so we figured, what did we have to loose?
    From our inner-suburb flat that sat above our recording studio, Isaac drove the two of us in his old model Corvette to the hotel where this party was to be hosted.  Valet parked it for us, and onto the red carpet we went.  Camera flashes lead the way, until finally, we were inside.
    Isaac and I didn't part on bad terms with Zac.  Isaac didn't even get to experience a good-bye with Zac.  And I guess that blame could be shifted onto me for Zac leaving, but really, he kind of left by himself...

    Maybe MTV could take responsibility for Zac leaving.  It was on the set of one of their many awards shows, and since Hanson had stopped winning them, we'd taken to presenting them to other young talents.  I think once you hit age twenty-one, you're not allowed to win them anymore.  This was all just after Isaac's twenty-first birthday, so Hanson were officially ineligible.
    Zac had been unusually quiet lately.  He stopped flirting with all the girls we met, he stopped screaming out hotel windows at passers-by, I was even convinced that he wasn't hitting his drumkit as hard.  Something was up.
    I couldn't take it anymore when Zac had Mandy Moore in front of him, and wasn't trying to make a pass at her.  I sat next to him on a couch in the green room.
    "What's up?" I quizzed quietly.
    "That's Mandy Moore in front of me," said Zac, nodding towards the tall blonde girl performing some warm-up vocals.  "Normally I'd try to chat with her, and then I'd get her phone number, and program it into my mobile phone."  Zac waved the phone in question around a little.  "And just like all those girls before her, I'd wonder if she's meant to be my first kiss."
    Girls would go koo koo if they knew about Zac's obsession with his "first kiss".  He'd never had one before, and was now becoming quite impatient about it.  Isaac and I always reminded him that when it happened, it would be better than what he imagined.  For his sake, Isaac and I hoped that what we kept saying was true.
    "Why don't you find out?  We all know she's a sweet girl."
    "Because I've finally figured out who I'm meant to kiss."  I smiled.
    "Well, that's great."  Zac bit his bottom lip, dragging it through his teeth.
    "Follow me.  They're here, I'll show you."  I followed Zac around the building, as he looked around corners and into rooms.  It was when we hit an empty room, he stopped.
    "Where are they?"  Zac seemed to be visibly trembling.
    "They're right here."  Zac shut his eyes, and pressed his lips against mine.  Before I could cry out in disgust, Zac slowed his passion down, letting me adjust to the abnormal situation.
    Zac obviously had been thinking about this a lot.  This little rendezvous had obviously been rehearsed in his mind, just like the perfection in his kiss must've been daydreamed about.  Before I knew it, I found myself disregarding any sickening preconceptions about what we were doing, and responded.
    Zac pulled away first.
    "Thank you, Taylor."
    And he walked out of the room...

   He didn't come home with us that night, he went home with Mum and Dad.  He had his named removed from Hanson's record contract, and I think he went to school, while Isaac and I continued our music.  When Isaac and I came home (a rare, but exciting occasion), he was out, on camp, some reasonable excuse.  We always forgave him, left him a note or a gift, and would get back to work.  Sometimes we even got a letter, or a gift back.
    I never felt guilty for how I felt and responded to the situation.  Some days it felt like only a dream.  You can't feel guilty over dreams.
    To start out, the fans were rather distressed that Zac left the group without any valid reasoning.  Isaac and I would be questioned on his departure, and all we could say was, "It was too much for him, he just wanted to be normal for a little while."  The grew used to the situation, though.
    I snapped back to reality, the MTV function.  Back to a blonde boy sitting at the bar, laughing and chatting with two girls.
    "Tay," grinned Isaac, turning to me.  I nodded enthusiastically.
    "It's Zac," I laughed delightfully.  "I can't believe it's been four years," I muttered, as Isaac and I made our way to the bar.
    "Zac?" called Isaac, standing behind the blonde boy and the two girls.  He spun around, his eyes widening.
    "Isaac?  Taylor?"  He couldn't ever deny that first smile that swept his face right then.
    "How are you?" we chanted.  Zac looked a little overwhelmed, before he stood up, and finally just wrapped his arms around the both of us.
    "I haven't seen you in years," he stuttered.  Isaac and I stepped back, still grinning like mad-men.  Zac had grown so much.  For starters, he was taller, the same height as me now, six two.  His shoulders were still broad, and his muscles still built up, puberty had defined him into a handsome young man.
    I couldn't deny that I was attracted to him.  That last night I saw him swum through my mind.
    Isaac, Zac, Zac's lady friends, and myself, sat around a table that MTV had set aside for us, sipping at pretty vodka drinks and laughing the night away, reminiscing about those nutty 'MMMBop' days.  It was all I could do to bite my tongue from saying, "There was this one time, at an MTV awards show, Zac kissed me."  Still, there was something lacking.  I found out what it was later.
    It was two am, and Isaac and I offered Zac a bed at our studio.  Who was he to decline?
    "Swish, you guys are doin' alright!"
    "Always welcome to join us," invited Isaac, his voice drenched with hope that Zac might consider the offer.
    "We'll see."
    Isaac went to bed early, with a promise to do breakfast.  I stayed up, turning on the TV, and Zac took a lone tour of the flat, before coming to sit by me again.  He didn't speak.
    "How did your graduation go?"
    "It was fun.  Melanie was naked under her gown."
    "That must've been pretty cool."
    "Yeah, it was."  Silence.
    "Still living at home?"
    "Yes."  Silence.  This was like pulling teeth.
    "Zac, what's wrong?"
    "I've kissed many people since you."
    "That's great, good for you."
    "They were nothing like my first."  Zac wasn't even looking at the TV which I had now turned down.
    "They always get better," I swooned.  "Especially if it's with the right person."
    "I've been with many people, I've made it a night with quite a few."
    "Zackie's moving up in the world."
    "I've still always wondered."  He rolled his head over his shoulders to finally look at me.  "My first kiss was the best kiss I've ever received."  I took a long, shaky breath.  What was going to happen next was inevitable.  "I thought maybe spending those four years away from you would change my mind.  I dated and slept around and generally had the experience that everyone dreams of having, hoping to forget you in that light."  He scooted closer to me on the couch.  "I never did."  I quickly spun around to see Isaac's door shut.  When I turned back around, Zac's lips greeted me with a light kiss.  "Just this once..."
    "I don't want you to disappear again."

This scene gets a little raunchy.  Click here to skip it.

    "Just this once..."  Zac completely disregarded my sentence, giving me another light kiss.  I swallowed hard, tentatively responding.  I shut my eyes.  What was I doing?  I never felt guilty about dreams, so I thought that my sin would be forgiven if I pretended Zac was someone different.  I let so many people flash in my mind.  I was kissing Mandy Moore, I was kissing that super-hot fan who flashed herself at our concert a couple of nights ago, I was kissing Zac...
    There was no denying it.  And now, there was no turning back either.
    Zac started coming on stronger, trying to elect a more passionate response from me.  I was still just trying to comprehend everything, but I let him lean himself over me, pushing me down onto the couch.  My shaky hands hooked themselves over his shoulders, and just rested there.  His, on the other hand, investigated my whole body.  He broke the kiss, and while his fingers danced around the buttons on my shirt, he looked up into my eyes, which I had now opened.
    "Are you okay with this?" he whispered.  He'd still kept his long blonde hair, the tips of it tickling my face.  I looked up into his eyes, wondering what to do next; wondering what I was feeling.
    "I'm just scared."  Zac smiled.  He had the most wonderful smile.  He'd never needed braces or retainers to make it so like Isaac and I did, it was an honest, genuine smile.
    "Don't be scared."  Slowly, I brought my head up, requesting a kiss.  Zac complied, and gently gave me what I wanted, before lifting the buttons on my shirt, letting them slide willingly from the constraints of the buttonholes.  Zac wasn't here to hurt me.  He never would intentionally.
    Zac's hands didn't stop at my shirt, he let them continue further down to my belt-buckle.  At his intent, my groin started to stiffen, and I was glad that he was undoing my jeans.  My own hands were shaking, I don't think I would've been able to do it.  I had never slept with another guy, and only two girls in my life.  From what I'd gathered, Zac had more experience than I did.  In my mind, he was officially in charge of tonight.
    "Calm down, Taylor," Zac hushed.  I brought my hands up, my skinny pianists' fingers caressing his rounded countenance, bringing it to mine for more delicious kissing.  I pulled my fingers through his long blonde hair, the golden locks soft and full.  My hands still shook, but fear was now turning to excitement.  The boy above me supplying the pleasure knew what he was doing, he was handsome, and we loved each other, a love that had been defined for years.  This was just another way of expressing it, in my mind anyway.  (It was amazing what reasoning I was coming up with to explain our actions.)
    Zac shifted so that he was straddling me  Keeping his lips on mine, he tugged at my cords, getting them down to around my thighs, the satin of my boxers allowing them to slide easily.  My ever-growing cock pitched like a tent in my crimson red boxers, and I wriggled beneath Zac, trying to rub it against something, and receive some relief.  When Zac started to strip, I whimpered a little.  He pulled off his turtleneck slowly, grinning at my eye-opening reaction.  Hell, I wasn't waiting for him to reach his jeans.  From his face to his waist, I pulled at he zipper, and unsnapped the button, causing the baggy piece of denim to fall to the knees he was resting on.
    "Since when did you stop wearing underwear?"
    "Since the groupies kept stealing it," rasped Zac, feasting my eyes with his enlarged member that I wasn't expecting so soon.  He laughed, and caught my opened mouth with a kiss, sliding his tongue in immediately over requesting entry with a lick and a kiss.  My hands crept from his hips, around to his ass, kneading the squishy flesh in my hands.  He arched his back, pressing his twitching dick against mine, the warm pieces of meat together sending a shock through me.  I wondered how big either of them could get, I'd never seen mine so.
    His lips left mine, trailing a path down my uncovered chest.  I watched him, the sensual gaze kept my eyes locked on his, until he reached my penis, and bent his head down.  When he lightly brushed his lips over the throbbing tip, I rolled my head back, and groaned deeply, trying not to make too much noise.  Acting on the noise I'd made, Zac trailed only the very tip of his tongue down my dick, gave each one of my balls a little kiss, before trailing back up my shaft again.  Oh, he had so done this before.
    My hands crept through his hair, giving it a pull when he finally took me into his mouth.  He bobbed up and down my length for a moment, and my excitement was escalating rapidly.
    "Oh my God, Zac..."I panted.  Giving one, final suck, he stopped the oral.  "Oh, don't stop!"  He giggled wickedly, and for a moment, I was a little worried about what he was going to do next.  He'd always been a wild, unpredictable child.  I was always the quiet one.
    I watched him squirm out of his pants, letting them drop by the front of the couch.  He still had one leg either side of me, as he sat on my knees.
    "You'll love this," he assured.  He grabbed me in his hands again, and I gave out a little mew.  He scooped up the precum drizzling down my cock, slathering it all over, before he crawled atop of me, and grazed his ass over the hot tip of my dick.  My eyelashes fluttered as I instinctively grabbed my cock in my hands, and guided it into Zac.  "That's it, Tay."
    At first, he was slow to let all of me in.  The way he had his mouth opened, panting heavily, indicated to me that he was enjoying this all, though.  He put his hands on my shoulders, one on each, keeping me pinned to the couch, as he started to ride me faster.  His tight hole was clasped around my throbbing cock, it was unlike anything I'd ever experienced, and I doubted I would ever experience it again.
    Much like my hands, my whole body started to shake.  I started to thrust into Zac harder and faster, the sexual tension making me deliriously horny.  I may have even passed out for just a little moment, but I know I was awake to hear Zac's erotic grunts pushing me over the edge.
    "Za-ac, I'm cah-cumming..." I breathed, the strong muscles controlling my crotch jumping up and delving deep into Zac, splashing hot semen in his insides.  That was it for him too, and I watched his dick explode, thick cream spurting all over my chest.  He collapsed onto my chest, breathing hard.  He kissed me.
    "Thank you, Taylor."  He let my spent dick fall from out of him, and started to dress me again.  It was quite loving.  First, he licked up all the cum on my chest with delicate kisses, before doing up the buttons.  He pulled up my boxers and cords, fumbling with the belt.  He stood up, dressed himself, and looked down on my tired self.  He mumbled something about sleeping where I normally did, and gave me a kiss.  This was a kiss to end all kisses, it was pure magic.  It started off soft and angelic, before Zac sucked a little, and then let go.  I was too weary after that session of loving, so I felt asleep without another word.

    I awoke with a start the next morning as the door of the flat slammed.  I sat up, hearing footsteps down the stairwell, down to the street below.  I could hear Isaac chatting excitedly, "Hope you can come back soon and stay!"  I jumped over the back of the couch, tripping a little, before running to follow my brothers.  I stumbled down the stairs, running my fingers through my disheveled hair.
    By the time I reached the sidewalk, all that was left was Isaac waving at a yellow cab.
    "Bye, Zac!" he called.  I just waved, dumbstruck.  He'd left, again.  Isaac turned to me.  "Nice of you to say goodbye!"
    "I was asleep, no one woke me up!" I exclaimed, rather mad this time.  If Zac was so into the idea that I was the best he was ever going to have, why didn't he stay to enjoy it a little more?
    "It's not your fault, he had a plane to catch," assured Isaac, wrapping an arm around my shoulder.
    Moments like last night, I didn't need him, I just wanted him.  It was a morning after like this that I needed him.  And he just wasn't here.  Maybe last night was a dream, at least I couldn't feel guilty then.  You can't feel guilty over dreams.

Song Credit:
Mandy Moore, 'When I Talk to You'
From her album 'Mandy Moore'

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